Wednesday, February 04, 2009

The Accidental Text-ist

"A long long time ago, I can still remember, how that phone call used to make me cringe. And I knew that if I had to talk, it would slow my focus down, and maybe I'd not get as much stuff done ..."

In the beginning, when I had a "car phone," and by car phone I mean seriously, that sucker was installed up on the column of my Toyota Celica (I miss that car so much) with a cord and all sorts of hoodie-hoo that allowed me to stay in touch with my homeys while I was getting my roll on. And by homeys I mean my BFF Toshi who would call with critical breaking news like, "OMG, do you have the radio on 107.3 because they're playing that Garbage song you LOVE," or "Do you think I should wear the thigh-high hose with this mini-dress and denim jacket?" (sidenote: the answer to that is always Hell Yes). Eventually I had to realize those calls were costing me $.45 per minute. And of course they were worth every red cent.

But one day oh about 2002 or so, I decided to push past my comfort zone when I got a new little Nokia telephone and I sent a text message. And immediately my life changed. No longer did I have to feign a conversation for 3 minutes to be able to say, "Buy milk," or "Going to ride my horse," or "Does my fat make me look fat?" I don't love a text message for a conversation so much - I'd still rather do that live, preferably over coffee - but it's bombdiggity for the short-order directive or observation. And let's not even talk about how texting vastly improved going out to clubs with your homeys. Who cares if it's 3 a.m. and there are 200 people smashed on a dancefloor under laser lights getting their Rhianna remix on? With texting, a few pushes of a button and we can accomplish many things like, "Your turn ... I'll have another SF Red Bull and Mandarin Absolut," or "This place is tired, let's bounce, be at car in 10 minutes."

Ever gotten a wrong number on your mobile phone? It happens, and has become increasingly more common since mobile phones have become so mandatory. But I've not really gotten an accidental text message.

Until yesterday.

And it wasn't just an accidental text. It was the mother of accidental texts. Initially I thought it was someone I know, even though it was just a telephone number and I have a strict policy that you must be "in" my contacts before I will answer. I replied with a "Who is this?" but never got an answer, so I had a co-worker call the number and she corroborated it's authenticity after the person answered.

Here's what it said [sic]:

"I know u got my washing powder i aint gonna worry about it cuz u did that shit being lodown and hateful i hope it eat yall skin off cuz u didnt have to bother shit of mines i didn't bother yours u should have left it"

There's a little piece of me that wants to post the phone number and then text back and say, "You really should be nicer and not wish caustic reactions upon other people's flesh. It's washing powder, for God's sake, not your life savings or world peace." But I will just relish in the awesomeness of the message and share it with the world through my blog.

Moral of story: get your phone number right before you fire off a text and be ready for anything.


Debbie Brady said...

OMG, that's hysterical!! Getting a message like that would makes my day just imagining the back story.

More Balanced Every Day said...

OMG I love it!! I got one of those once thanking me for helping this guy's girlfriend in the bathroom the night before...Hmmm...

Shelby's Mom said...

Best blog yet! Something like that would happen only to YOU

Such said...

Same goes for replying to emails.

1. Make sure you hit "reply" and not "reply all" unless you want everyone to hear your reply.

2. Make sure your reply goes to the person who sent the message to you and not the person who's message he forwarded to you. When you forward mail on a treo, a reply will go to the original sender, not necessarily the person who sent you the email.

3. Make sure you hit forward when you want to forward snarky comments on someone else's email and not reply so the sender sees your comments.