Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Red Bull: Elixir or Toxin?

Until last Friday night, I'd never actually consumed a Red Bull for its intended purpose - energy. I think I'd only ever had one and it was probably 3 years ago and may've been at a television appearance in Arkansas when it was really early and, hey, back then I probably had consumed an entire 10-cup pot of coffee so what's a Red Bull on top of that, I ask?

And so it was Friday at 6 p.m. that I embarked on a journey from Tuscaloosa to Little Rock. This journey was part of the Robby's Mobile Clipping Service winter junket, and I had 4 horses to body clip in about 36 hours. For those who don't know what body-clipping is, quite simply it's shaving off all of the horse's winter coat with these really high-powered clippers. Some horses are fine with this being done, others need drugs. 3 of the 4 I did needed drugs. God, did they ever need their drugs.

So at 9:30 p.m. I roll into the Flying J Truck Stop in Olive Branch, Mississippi, just "this side" of Memphis, to fill up on diesel, snacks, and so that Maddie and I could take biology breaks. I wasn't tired at this point but opted for a Red Bull "just in case." Because I'm a lush by nature, I'd downed the entire thing by the time I'd even crossed the river into Arkansas and by the time I got to Forrest City, a mere 40 miles in, I thought I was going to have to pull over because the lights on everyone's vehicles were jumping up and down and I could not read their license plates.

Fortunately this subsided and I reached my destination at exactly midnight. Crazy times, man. Crazy times. And if you think I did not lather/rinse/repeat when I drove home Sunday, you're wrong. Sugar Free Red Bull is my new favorite thing.

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